Four children under the age of four, living in two bedrooms, with one income is hard (and one of the four isn't even born yet)! I've been pregnant or nursing for the last five years straight! Pregnancy and breastfeeding are taxing on the human body. I'm exhausted and my body is not handling the added stress very well. My thyroid is not functioning as it should and now I'm on medicine to control my heart rate! Needless to say, having anymore children is probably not wise on our part.
Yes, we've prayed about whether or not we should have more kids. We both feel at peace that the answer is NO! We've got the perfect sib-set of two older boys and two younger girls. Our children are happy and healthy and all we could ask for! So why am I so concerned about it?
I was watching my kiddos play outside today when it hit me how grown up my Baby Girl is getting. She's running around with her Brother's, speaking so many words/sentences, and just overall acting like a Big Girl!
I was comforted in the fact that I'll get to go through the Baby stage again with this little lady. But then I was struck by the realization that when this Baby grows up we're not having anymore babies. No more nursing, no more swaddling, no more total dependance. While I am looking forward to no more diapers, middle-of-the-night-feedings, and sleep deprivation - I will miss the smells, sounds and feelings that only newborn babies bring.
I'm so thankful for my Children and am so blessed to be their Mama! I just have to trust God to continue to grant me peace with the decision to have no more babies after this little lady! I plan to relish in every single second of newborn bliss with this Baby and continue to soak up every moment with these children as they grow and change before my very eyes!
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