Missing my little ones

No, I'm not talking about the three children I live with and I'm not even talking about the little lady stretching and kicking in my womb. I'm missing my two babies that are waiting for us in Heaven. I often wonder what life would be like if we hadn't lost Urijah. Would we have the children we have now? Would we be where we are in life now? What about if we hadn't lost Aubrey? She'd be about one month old right now. How would her siblings feel about her? How would they be reacting to her?

I wonder what Heaven is like. What are they doing right now? I'm sure they're loving every moment with Jesus but I sure do miss them. We may have only had them for a moment here on Earth but I'm thankful for their lives. I wish things were different but I praise God for the three, almost four, wonder blessings we do have here in our arms.

We named both of our babies that we lost and I often wonder if we chose the right names since we won't "know" their gender until we meet them someday in Heaven. I'm glad they at least have names, I just hope they're right! I know it won't matter in the end but every life deserves a name!

I wonder if we would have six children here on earth if we hadn't lost our two babies. Or would we have stopped sooner? Would we have Jacobi, Micah, Shaelyn or this Baby Girl? Would these other children be with us? I long for the day I can see my babies again.

Urijah and Aubrey, Mama loves you and misses you! I hope you're proud of your family!!! I can't wait to meet you and see who you look like! I bet you're both gorgeous, just like your Brothers and Sisters!